I love crossfit but there are times where I am just not in the mood. Well, today was one of those days. Not because I had to do burpees, but there have been days where I just don't feel it. On those days when my alarm wakes me up for my early AM workout I want to hit snooze and give myself an excuse as to why I shouldn't go. Back hurts, muscles are sore, got a lot of work to do, too tired, and the list goes on and on. The challenge for me in those moments is ignoring those excuses and remembering how how incredibly guilty/bad I will feel all day if I don't go. Not wanting to play that guilty battle today, I got up and hit the AM workout. On the sweaty drive home, feeling much better, I got to thinking why I struggle so hard some mornings when I love crossfit so much.
I think I am so focused on where I am going/who I am becoming....that I am forgetting who I was/where I came from. In a matter of months since I started crossfit, my lifestyle is dramatically different. Before crossfit, I was fully equipped with a ton of bad habits that took years to perfect; smoking cigarettes, drinking excessively, making excuses not to workout, overeating then going days without eating, and so on. When I recall where I was in life just a few months ago, it reminds me how I felt; depressed, tired, angry, hungover, unable to breathe and embarrassed.
Recalling my history in such a brutal way was a big awakening for me. I will never succeed at changing myself for the better if I don't remember what it was like when I was at my worse. It is sort of the same theory we overweight folks face when confronted with a mirror. "If I don't see it, it doesn't exist." Well, if I am to be successful, I need to face the mirror. While I will continue to focus on what I am accomplishing, I will also reflect on my past as a reminder to help push me towards my goal.
Even writing this I am amazed to realize that in just a matter of a few months of crossfit, I have already changed so much. I don't drink, I don't smoke and my diet has much improved to a healthier lifestyle (paleo). Without crossfit, I don't think I would even be this far. Just something about it finally made me want to change.
Paving a new road, but remember what the old looked like,
Anna Dubya
http://knockout-crossfit.com/
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